tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-132574824624874251.post6498783666116385573..comments2022-10-28T09:10:20.055-04:00Comments on Life Goes On: No big dealRebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03555672583756632794noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-132574824624874251.post-25411645445221598852010-01-22T14:06:23.372-05:002010-01-22T14:06:23.372-05:00I was just reading the UK SANDS website and found ...I was just reading the UK SANDS website and found <a href="http://www.uk-sands.org/Support/Personal-experiences/Personal-Experience-Index/Long-Ago-Bereaved.html" rel="nofollow">this</a> - I don't know if you would send it to your friend, but I found the stories heartbreaking. It might help her to understand - maybe not, but I thought I would show you the link anyway.Bethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12523875341438470968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-132574824624874251.post-25621753593494374792010-01-14T23:35:50.695-05:002010-01-14T23:35:50.695-05:00Wow. It's still amazing to me that people thi...Wow. It's still amazing to me that people think losing a child is something you just "get over". I'm sure I will never get over Calvin's death even fifty years down the road. What I don't get is that she is a mother and must know the bond between mother and child and how strong and precious that is. Hopefully B will never have to experience what we've gone through, but sometimes I wish people on the outside could have a moment of understanding where they could feel the depth and breadth of the pain we are in when we lose our children. Maybe then it would change the minds of those who think it is "no big deal". Hugsmargarethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16494588299838654564noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-132574824624874251.post-73260606029338874822010-01-14T17:17:29.292-05:002010-01-14T17:17:29.292-05:00I know I didn't understand just how hard this ...I know I didn't understand just how hard this was before I lost Matilda but I'm pretty sure (I can't seem to remember what my thoughts were on this used to be) I had enough empathy to realise that people didn't 'get over it' in a lifetime. <br /><br />I also can't believe your friend said that because my friends who don't seem to understand just how big this is and how much time it's going to take before I can integrate this into my life don't have kids of their own. <br /><br />I'm going to write a guest post for a blog (not a baby loss blog) and one of the things I want to include is that this is something we'll hurt about forever. We don't ever get to reach a place in our lives where we won't imagine what our babies would be like now. <br /><br />Hugs.Maddiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15665878580598197034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-132574824624874251.post-17732435845428981622010-01-14T11:32:45.880-05:002010-01-14T11:32:45.880-05:00my husband's grandad had a sister who died whe...my husband's grandad had a sister who died when he was 6 years old. <br /><br />now, more than ever, i understand that he must still grieve for her, even though he's not the kind of person you can imagine grieving at all. <br /><br />some people don't understand. can't understand. and to be honest, i wouldn't wish that understanding on anyone. <br /><br />i don't know what else to say. because it was a really insensitive thing for her to say, cruel even. but... she doesn't understand. she can't understand. it's not fair though that she would choose to say all that to you. <br /><br />thinking of you.Bethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12523875341438470968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-132574824624874251.post-25738590340426320632010-01-14T04:48:31.522-05:002010-01-14T04:48:31.522-05:00This is a very interesting post. Unfortunately, I ...This is a very interesting post. Unfortunately, I myself don't seem able to empathise with someone going through an experience, unless I have had that experience myself. How many people can? Before my mother died, I had no understanding of how painful bereavement can be - and that the fact that a person is elderly, and is expected to die - does not appear to ammeliorate the pain of losing them. I am making no comparisons with the loss of your dear baby, for which I offer my heartfelt sympathy. All I am saying is that I thought my world was collapsing when my mother died, and only some of my friends - usually the ones who had lost their dearly loved parents - could empathise with that feeling.Sue Hepworthhttp://www.suehepworth.comnoreply@blogger.com